It was Maria who first suggested it, after a few drinks one night. It wasn't technically illegal, though it was really socially frowned on. I understood it, it was selfish to mate outside of the organized protocols. Most people didn't have the option. But it also felt unfair that I would spend most of my life without a child because I was one of the few who had a penis. Maybe in the future we would change things to make it easier to move up in line but that wasn't going to happen for me.